- Sit back in your camp chairs while the kids pitch the tent.
2. Lure the kids into the woods by telling them they’re going on a fun hiking trip with Daddy.
3. Lead them deep in the woods (don’t bring any bread crumbs!) then run away as fast as you can. Unfortunately, these trails were well marked, so the kids eventually found us again.
4. Allow the kids to play in the flesh-eating bacteria laden creek. But don’t fret too much if they fall in because you can…
5. …air dry the kids in tree branches.
6. Let them catch all the butterflies they like. Then tell them the butterflies are venomous so you can sit back and laugh at the look of horror on your children’s faces.
7. Finally, tuck them in. But before you do, tell scary stories using creepy shadow puppets on the tent wall. Nighty night kids!